I love the bonsai tree. There is such beauty in its simplicity. It brings a sense of calm and peace. I am intrigued that something so small is often quite advanced in years. It causes me to slow down and contemplate the shape of each branch, the structure of the tree. And then I begin wondering… How many tiny snips did it take to get this shape? How many times did it’s pruner wonder which branch to cut and which to allow to grow? Was there ever a time that the gardener thought the tree wouldn’t make it due to soil conditions or pests? How many years has it been growing quietly, unassuming in its diminutive nature?
Gardening for me has always had parallels in my personal life. When I weed, I enjoy the feeling of getting rid of the bad in order to make room for the good. When I prune the plum tree in the front yard, I enjoy taking time to decide which direction each branch should grow to allow the tree to develop to its full potential. At the same time, I can’t help but think of the direction I am growing and if there are areas or activities that I need to prune from my life so that I can reach my full potential. When I feed my banana trees rich compost, I think about how taking care of myself helps me to “produce good fruit” and be my best.
So when I see the bonsai tree, I immediately think of raising children. It takes so much time. And effort. And patience. And there are days that I am sure I’ve pruned the wrong branch and ruined them forever. There are seasons when I’m not sure there is any growth happening…at all. It is impossible to predict the shape that their life will take. All I can do is keep pruning and nurturing, giving them the space that they need to grow into who they are meant to be.
So wherever you are on your journey, know that all of the effort is worth it. Raising kids is a long-term project with many ups and downs. This season that you’re in will not last forever. If you’re in a fun season, enjoy it…store up those good memories! If you’re in a difficult season, take heart…it will pass. Don’t be too hard on yourself. And remember that good growth is happening, even when we can’t see it.